Welcome to the New Blog
Welcome to the first post. I had a blog at www.ptsdsurvival.blogspot.com. But due to techical problems beyond my control, I had to move to this new one. Feel free to check the old one for more background posts on me and other connected topics.
Here we have a mixture of information. PTSD symptoms. Holistic health. Online security. A growing link list to crisis centers and other helpful sources. Think of it as a one stop blog that does many things at the same time.
Some things about me. I'm a rape survivor that was repeatedly raped by three psycho pedolphiles over an extended period of time. None of them (or their accomplices) were ever arrested. I was drugged against my will and terrified that I had no control over my body. No cop burst into the room to save me. Nobody ever said we need a rape kit. I've been screamed at by cops, prosecutors and even an FBI trauma specialist who was very pissed at me for wasting her valuable time. Nobody ever said, were you raped.
Instead, I violently dissociated for a really long time. Think of it as trying to dissconnect from horrible pain. As far as I know, I have my little kid and 25 seperate personalities. Sometimes I have dissociative blackouts when one of them could lash out.
Despite all of this, I try to keep many things in mind:
It's not our fault.
We did nothing wrong.
We're not a threat to anybody.
Just because we got raped doesn't mean that we're gay, bi sexual or a psycho pedophile. I know that not all gay guys are psycho pedophiles.
We know all of these things. But the pain never goes away. Some days we have thoughts about suicide. But would I ever do that? No. It is important though to admit that those thoughts are there.
I tried for a long time to be heard in other avenues. But almost no one listened. So I said, okay. I'll start my own system.
Feel free to pass this blog onto anyone else that you think it might help. This blog has two way security built in. It protects me and anyone who checks it out.
For trauma survivors, your symptoms are a reflection of your trauma history. The same rule applies to everybody. Your trauma pain will come out. Either it comes out in one way. Or lots of others. But it will come out.
Thanks for reading.
Here we have a mixture of information. PTSD symptoms. Holistic health. Online security. A growing link list to crisis centers and other helpful sources. Think of it as a one stop blog that does many things at the same time.
Some things about me. I'm a rape survivor that was repeatedly raped by three psycho pedolphiles over an extended period of time. None of them (or their accomplices) were ever arrested. I was drugged against my will and terrified that I had no control over my body. No cop burst into the room to save me. Nobody ever said we need a rape kit. I've been screamed at by cops, prosecutors and even an FBI trauma specialist who was very pissed at me for wasting her valuable time. Nobody ever said, were you raped.
Instead, I violently dissociated for a really long time. Think of it as trying to dissconnect from horrible pain. As far as I know, I have my little kid and 25 seperate personalities. Sometimes I have dissociative blackouts when one of them could lash out.
Despite all of this, I try to keep many things in mind:
It's not our fault.
We did nothing wrong.
We're not a threat to anybody.
Just because we got raped doesn't mean that we're gay, bi sexual or a psycho pedophile. I know that not all gay guys are psycho pedophiles.
We know all of these things. But the pain never goes away. Some days we have thoughts about suicide. But would I ever do that? No. It is important though to admit that those thoughts are there.
I tried for a long time to be heard in other avenues. But almost no one listened. So I said, okay. I'll start my own system.
Feel free to pass this blog onto anyone else that you think it might help. This blog has two way security built in. It protects me and anyone who checks it out.
For trauma survivors, your symptoms are a reflection of your trauma history. The same rule applies to everybody. Your trauma pain will come out. Either it comes out in one way. Or lots of others. But it will come out.
Thanks for reading.
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