ptsdwellbeing

For the past few weeks it's been constant pain as we fight not to dissociate. It's like a migrane 24 hours a day. Despite all of that, you have to fight back. If you don't, you'll fall apart. You can't let your guard down. Protect yourself.

A constant struggle to not dissociate. You have to fight back. You also feel constantly exhausted. But what else can you do? Body memory, torture flashbacks and more. Protect yourself.

Went to see the psychiatrist today. We talked a lot about trying to practice holistic health together with traditional medicine. Holistic means it's all one big thing, Not two separate things. Be aware of what's happening in the world and try to make things better. But keep in mind you're not on call 24/7 to save the world. Many times lately we just turn everything off because it's too much. Protect yourself.

If you're not careful, relapses are almost like an automatic reflex. You lose track of time and don't know where you are. Protect yourself. Because you have to.

We try to practice holistic health as much as possible. Everything is one big thing, and not two separate ones. Pay attention to how tiny things affect you. Because they do. Do you still struggle with despair? Feeling abandoned? It feels like that never goes away. But you have no control over others who choose to say and do horrible things. In the end they have to deal with the consequences. It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong. You're a human being who's entitled to anger and all of your other emotions. Protect yourself.

Listen and repeat. You have no control over the horrible things that others say and do. Nobody forces them to do this. They CHOOSE to do this. Which means they deal with the consequences. You have to set boundaries. You have to protect your well being. Others in the "immediate family" lie and manipulate. But you do your best to stand up for your well being. You did nothing wrong. You aren't a threat to anybody. Including yourself. Protect yourself.

Fighting to not relapse. This will only make your pain worse. Protect yourself.

Don't have a relapse. The pain will be twice as bad as before. Don't put your yourself in a potentially dangerous situation where you might black out. You have to fight back. You're constantly run down. But what else can you do? Protect yourself.

The longer you go without a relapse, the more exhausted you feel. The past few weeks have been constantly feeling run down. Despite this, you have to keep going. The pain never goes away. Body pain never goes away. Body memory never goes away. Maybe nobody in the immediate family (whatever that means ) will ever actually mean it by giving us a reassuring hug and saying I'm sorry you were raped. If that never happens, we know that we did nothing wrong. Protect yourself.

Sorry to be away for a while. We've been busy fighting to not black out and let our guard down. The longer you go without a relapse the more exhausted you feel. This means that you have to fight back. Because there's nothing else. Do you have nightmares? Sleep paralysis? It feels like this never goes away. You feel like you're struggling to wake up, but you can't do anything. You can't open your eyes. You can't talk. You can't move any part of your body. Our psychiatrist keeps saying that you can't die from sleep paralysis. But that doesn't take away the terror of it. Other people who say and do horrible things will never change. Do you still have flashbacks? Our pain will never go away. As far as these others go, they CHOOSE to do this. So they deal with the consequences. Don't even try to make us feel guilty. It's not your fault. You did nothing wrong. If others will never try to be supportive, they choose to do that. They then deal