Sorry to Be Away For Awhile

Hi. Did you miss me? Sorry to be away for so long. But I was in the hospital for almost two weeks due to a heart disease relapse. What caused it? A combination of several things:

My medication mix needed to be adjusted to have the correct dosages.
Inadvertantly, I got sloppy in reading the labels on many things to make sure my diet was a low salt one.

But now, the mix is correct and my energy is back. I can focus and don't feel like I have almost no heart function.

Despite that, I still have all my health problems. PTSD symptoms are more vicious now than before. You feel at times like you're going to snap in two. But you have to fight back. You don't have the luxury of just sitting back and going with your feelings. That doesn't work.

It has to come out. I have nothing to hide behind anymore. Denial will only make things worse. Part of it also is that you feel like you see the full horror of your trauma history and how you have to fight to maintain some sense of focus.

We still have the full range of symptoms. But I know that I'm doing the right things. To protect not only me, but also my little kid and multiples.

Protect your well being.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What's Torture Really Like (contains extremely graphic content and language. If this bothers you, DO NOT READ THIS)?

Welcome to our always growing international audience. As you well know (or if you don't know), here Trump and other powerful people think torture is a great thing. The new CIA Director nominee is a lifetime CIA covert agent and manager. She actually ran a torture black site and helped to destroy torture evidence. Now she's being rewarded with the top job. For those who think torture works, I have first hand proof that it doesn't. In fact, just the opposite. The victim will do and say ANYTHING  to make it stop. NOTE. This post contains extremely graphic language and triggering content. If this bothers you, STOP READING NOW. No? All right then. Let's continue. I was repeatedly raped by three psycho pedophiles over a long period of time. They never got prosecuted. Their accomplices were never prosecuted. I can't get any victim compensation or file a criminal or civil suit against anyone. I have complex disscoiative disorder (an extremely severe and incurable ty
Read more

Day 19 of the Shutdown

The shutdown continues. More innocent people are being endangered. At least one person has died. How come nobody's been prosecuted? Is this murder? Criminally negligent homicide? It's a fucking crime. I'm trying to protect myself as best I can. Set boundaries and keep you side of things clean. You can't just sit back and do nothing. Be careful.
Read more

A Long Day of Fighting Symptoms

You fight because you have to. Constant exhaustion and symptoms are always there. Pain and evil is all over the place. Despite that, you have to fight to try and keep some sense of being grounded. You feel abandoned, sad and not sure of what to do. But you know it's not your fault. Like anyone with incurable conditions, you do your best to cope. Protect yourself.
Read more