Back from the Holiday
How is your part of the world? Here, we got back from a few days out of town. Went to a major city with lots of traffic and unfortunately kind of slow. With the heat index, the average highs were about 110F.
Despite that, we also struggled with severe depression. Went out to eat one day and made the mistake of eating a triggering food. I walked back to the hotel and felt suicidal. Stayed in my room and called a crisis line. We talked for a while and then for the rest of my trip I basically stayed in the hotel. My well being comes first.
I know we did nothing wrong. We're not abnormal in any way. But trauma pain is really severe. One reason why is because the longer you go without having a dissociative relapse, the worse it feels. On the other hand, if we felt no pain at all, then we'd really be in danger.
The pain never goes away. But denial doesn't work. You have to fight back.
Protect yourself.
Despite that, we also struggled with severe depression. Went out to eat one day and made the mistake of eating a triggering food. I walked back to the hotel and felt suicidal. Stayed in my room and called a crisis line. We talked for a while and then for the rest of my trip I basically stayed in the hotel. My well being comes first.
I know we did nothing wrong. We're not abnormal in any way. But trauma pain is really severe. One reason why is because the longer you go without having a dissociative relapse, the worse it feels. On the other hand, if we felt no pain at all, then we'd really be in danger.
The pain never goes away. But denial doesn't work. You have to fight back.
Protect yourself.
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