Pain, Relapses and More

Sorry to be away for a while. Nightmares, torture flashbacks and constant body pain are there. Two days ago, we had a dissociative relapse.

We try really hard to not torture ourselves. We're not a failure. But we don't want to feel terrified and have no idea of where we are. Every time you have a relapse it's like all of the pain and noise disappear. You feel like you finally have some peace. But we know that's not true.

We don't want to fall apart.
We don't want to be scared all of the time.
You have to protect yourself.

Stay safe.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

What's Torture Really Like (contains extremely graphic content and language. If this bothers you, DO NOT READ THIS)?

Welcome to our always growing international audience. As you well know (or if you don't know), here Trump and other powerful people think torture is a great thing. The new CIA Director nominee is a lifetime CIA covert agent and manager. She actually ran a torture black site and helped to destroy torture evidence. Now she's being rewarded with the top job. For those who think torture works, I have first hand proof that it doesn't. In fact, just the opposite. The victim will do and say ANYTHING  to make it stop. NOTE. This post contains extremely graphic language and triggering content. If this bothers you, STOP READING NOW. No? All right then. Let's continue. I was repeatedly raped by three psycho pedophiles over a long period of time. They never got prosecuted. Their accomplices were never prosecuted. I can't get any victim compensation or file a criminal or civil suit against anyone. I have complex disscoiative disorder (an extremely severe and incurable ty
Read more

Day 19 of the Shutdown

The shutdown continues. More innocent people are being endangered. At least one person has died. How come nobody's been prosecuted? Is this murder? Criminally negligent homicide? It's a fucking crime. I'm trying to protect myself as best I can. Set boundaries and keep you side of things clean. You can't just sit back and do nothing. Be careful.
Read more

A Long Day of Fighting Symptoms

You fight because you have to. Constant exhaustion and symptoms are always there. Pain and evil is all over the place. Despite that, you have to fight to try and keep some sense of being grounded. You feel abandoned, sad and not sure of what to do. But you know it's not your fault. Like anyone with incurable conditions, you do your best to cope. Protect yourself.
Read more